Readers who have seen The Godfather, a truly classic film, will be familiar with the scene at the end when Michael Corleone, the new Godfather, attends a christening.  While The Don is at the christening, those who crossed him meet their destiny with the after life.  I couldn’t help but make the connection when I read this morning in The Sunday Times that Lord Mandelson wants to be Foreign Secretary.

As The Sunday Times notes: ” Mandelson’s reshuffle call puts the prime minister in a perilous position as he struggles to retain the support of the most powerful figures in the cabinet. If he bows to Mandelson’s wishes, he risks alienating David Miliband, the foreign secretary, and his ally Ed Balls, the schools secretary, who is still eager for promotion. If he refuses Mandelson’s demand, he risks losing his loyalty with potentially devastating consequences for the election.”

As they say… Revenge is a dish best eaten cold…. Game, Set and Match to Mandelson?  Brown could well be stuffed on this one. You have to laugh…. Ladies and Gentleman… we have a new Richard III of The Labour Party… I present… for your delectation and delight… Baron Mandelson of Foy, Foreign Secretary of The United Kingdom.   Of course, it could just be a load of balls and everyone at the top end of the labour party is happy, working harmoniously together,  and only thinking of the best interests of the country as a whole.

SHIT…. I’ve just seen a squadron of black leather clad stormtrooper pigs fly over Upnor Castle on the River Medway… they are heading for Westminster… and they look as if they mean business. You couldn’t make it up…. wonderful nonsense. The Sunday Times piece is rather amusing… and worth a read.

And don’t forget this from The Times on 27 September….

LORD Mandelson has disclosed that he is ready to accept a job under a future Conservative government.

In an interview with The Sunday Times magazine, “the business secretary said he would be willing to put his “experience at the disposal of the country”, if Labour lost power. “As I grow older, I can imagine more ways of serving my country than simply being a party politician,” he said.

Asked whether he might use his experience in business and world trade under a future government, he said: “If I was asked to do something for my country using that asset base, of course, I would consider it.”

//

“When another country introduces laws to protect its citizens from your courts, you have a problem. When that country happens to be your closest ally in times of war and peace, you have a crisis. That is the state of English libel law.”

John Kampfner is chief executive of Index on Censorship and author of Freedom For Sale.
Times

The good news… is that Jack Straw, Lord Chancellor and Secretary of State for Justice, is going to do something about it and, hopefully, the backing of the other parties.

The Times reports: “The justice secretary says the large legal fees involved in defamation cases in English courts are jeopardising freedom of speech, potentially curbing vital debate by scientists, academics and journalists.”

Inevitably, lawyers and other ’special interest’ groups are rushing to lobby against changes. I do hope this comes to something because if it it doesn’t one can be fairly certain with mounting anger and awareness, Twitter, mainstream media and pressure from  voluntary organisations will build to a point where no government will be able to ignore the pressure.  Our justice system has been undermined and devalued by the injustice of our libel laws.  Freedom of speech, the right to investigate matters in the public interest, responsible and informed comment should be encouraged in a modern society.  The irony, of course, is that many who seek superinjunctions do have something to hide and a carefully framed revision of libel law should be able to protect the victims of genuine and malicious defamation.

Will I be sorry to see the demise of lucrative fees to lawyers when the libel laws are changed?  Will I be sorry to see a valuable source of invisible export income dry up?

You can be sure that I won’t be sorry – and there are countless thousands more out there who feel the same way.  Fortunately, there are some (individuals and organisations) who are more vociferous because of their ability to spread the word. Let’s hope they pile the pressure on until we rid our jurisprudence and legal system of these vile and undemocratic laws.

Dear Reader,

I can’t quite believe it is that time again… the weekend, postcard time.  I may have been watching too many programmes on quantum physics, but there does seem to be an inexorable law of physics which states that as one gets older, time speeds up. I  also noticed that it was Children In need time again.  I don’t have children so I don’t tend to spend much time (or, indeed, any) time thinking about them – but I was amused by a tweet from fellow tweeter John Kerrison last night.

The Archbishop of Canterbury, Dr Rowan Williams, is meeting with The Pope to express disappointment at the way the Catholic church is welcoming all his members, tolerant men and women to a tee, who don’t care much for homosexuals or women bishops. Being a confirmed atheist, I do not spend any time, usually, reading about religious news – although if and when The Messiah does return I’m sure that it will be covered by Newsnight, so I’ll make an exception.  Machinations, on the other hand, in religion as much as other walks of life… fascinate me.  The Pope is welcoming disenchanted Anglicans into the Catholic fold and is bending the rules to allow them to be married and carry on their own ‘practices’… and appears to be enjoying himself in so doing. I suppose it is the equivalent of a ratings war between television companies or market share war between gas and electricity suppliers.  I wonder if I will get a phone call from some call centre asking me if I would like to change my religion and get a better chance of life ever after?

800 years of history swept away

Frances Gibb, legal editor of The Times, reports: ” Barristers will be free to set up in partnership with solicitors or with each other under historic reforms approved last night by the Bar Standards Board. The landmark decision was taken at a packed public meeting of the Board along with a series of other changes that ditch 800 years of working practices in the profession. The Board, chaired by Baroness Ruth Deech, agreed in principle that barristers could be permitted to join in partnerships with solicitors and others without having to qualify first as solicitors, under the regulation of the Solicitors Regulation Authority.”

Baroness Deech, who appears to be everywhere these days said… and I just love this statement which I suspect will have some barristers reviving their interest in Anglo-Saxon epithets… “”I do think it will send a shot of adrenalin through the profession and hopefully it will revive and pick up without losing the benefits [of its traditional working methods and core principles].”

I had no idea the Bar was so stricken across the range of practice – which, of course, it isn’t. It will be interesting to see how The Bar responds.  Being a rather disparate group, I suspect there will be many styles of working and, inevitably, because it will suit a section of the Bar, the current practices will be maintained. I shall have to talk to a few more barristers and see what they think  before commenting further.

I have just seen a tweet from stephenfry : I’m hoping the decision to screen anti benefit fraud ads during the darts isn’t a reflection on what the govmnt thinks of darts fans, LOL.

Given the statistical probability that there are, indeed, a fair number of potential benefit fraudsters among the dart competition watching fraternity, it is good to see the government using our money wisely. This led me to thinking about other appropriately targetted advertising.  Perhaps a public information film on burglary during The Antiques Roadshow?. A care in the community film during X-factor? The usual drunk driving message during Top Gear? That, actually, would be quite sensible given the number of petrol heads in this country. The only problem is, those with a disposition to drive while drunk are probably out drinking and driving, rather than watching TV.  Anyway… I could waste more time musing on this, but I won’t.

RollonFriday reports :“A student at Leeds university has pleaded guilty to impersonating a London barrister. ” This is not the way forward to a career in law. What was this student thinking?  Bizarre.

The Recess Monkey has a good story about a Tory complaining that “too few applicants for the Tory candidacy have “normal English names”. Given that he sent the email at nearly 1am, you wonder how often he lies awake angry at those damn foreigners with their foreign names, foreign food and foreign ways…. It appears David Cameron has now suspended Hobbins (which isn’t actually an English name and in fact is from Buckland). There is no suggestion as yet that the tens of thousands of bigots remaining the the Tory Party will face a similar fate.”

Do read the whiole story, particularly Mr Hobbins’ email. Yep… there are still fools in the Tory ship.

Well… that’s about it for this week… My plans to develop my new series ‘The Huntsman’s View are developing.  Episode 1 and Episode 2 are out… Episode 3 is being written.  Each episode, as with my West London Man series last year will have  an accompanying podcast.

Best, as ever

Charon

]]> http://charonqc.wordpress.com/2009/11/21/postcard-from-the-staterooms-21-november-09/feed/ 1 charonqc http://charonqc.wordpress.com/2009/11/20/diary-of-a-huntsman-2-invisibility/ http://charonqc.wordpress.com/2009/11/20/diary-of-a-huntsman-2-invisibility/#comments Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:23:08 +0000 charonqc http://charonqc.wordpress.com/?p=6278 ]]>

PODCAST VERSION: A Hunstman’s View (2) / Invisibility

20th November 2009

The London trip was not a great success and a fresh assessment is required if I am to stand for parliament.  Cybil has a rather curious attitude to politics.  She listens to what politicians say and assesses their worth and value accordingly. I remember, over dinner some time ago, she made the extraordinary statement “Why can’t we have a government with just the sensible people from all parties in it? Vince Cable, for example, he seems to be the only politician who (a) has actually grappled with economic and financial policies in real life -  running a business  and (b) seems to have a better grasp of things than the current Chancellor does.  Why can’t we have him as Chancellor?” There was an embarrassed silence at the table.  Jamie Cadogan-Browne… a grandee.. I suppose you would call him, had a coughing fit and I thought I was going to have to put my old Boy Scout first aid badge knowledge to use.

Question Time and the great Tory Law & Order hope

We watched Question Time together last night and a vivid illustration of this technique of assessing politicians on what they say,  rather than on the basis of the party they represent,  presented early on in the form of Shadow Home Secretary, Chris Grayling.

“See, darling” Cybil said with an amused smile “Grayling… saying nothing of any value whatsoever… hot air and blether…. just like that other chap Ian Duncan-Smith …blah blah blah. All those years in television have reduced his thinking into simplistic impressionistic summaries suitable for a game show but hardly of value when it comes to serious debate. He’s being slaughtered and they are all laughing at him on Twitter.”

I have now discovered what Twitter is.  Cybil, apparently, has been on it for months.  She tells me that there are quite a lot of sensible people and bloggers using it including some MPs from Labour who are using it rather well. I must investigate this Twitter further and these blogger johnnies. I had wondered why she was spending so much time tapping away into the laptop of hers while doing a myriad of other things.  A chap, of course, prefers to focus on one thing at a time. I shall ask Jack, my head keeper, if he knows anything about  Twitter. He’s another one who is always tapping away into a laptop or his new iPhone.

I have to say that Cybil may have a point. Grayling didn’t do at all well last night on QT – not quite as bad as that chap Woollas for Labour,  who must have lost thousands of votes every time he opened his mouth… but there we are. The problem the Tories have is that they did have a fairly useful Shadow Home Secretary in David Davis, the member for the constituency of Haltemprice, who resigned, stood against himself on a a matter of principle,  and fired himself into political obscurity (albeit with a bit more style than that Parnell chap for Labour did when he resigned and then looked baffled when no-one noticed.)

CameronDirect needs a new Shadow Home Secretary but he won’t,  of course,  fire Grayling, Grayling won’t fall on his sword, so another chink in the slick corporate armour of CameronDirect is opening up for others to push sticks into before the election in 2010.  I’m rather looking forward, I have to confess, to seeing what nonsense Grayling comes up with next in his vision of a Law & Ordered Society‘ after his surreal ideas for yobs the other day.

The big thing at the moment for the Tories is for elected Police Chiefs. James Forsyth, writing in The Spectator, states “It is crucial that the Tories do not back down under this pressure. Locally elected police commissioners would be transformative, they would ensure that the police concentrate on the crimes that most effect peoples’ quality of life. The current top down, target-ridden culture would be replaced by accountability to the public.”  They say that the police are already politicised, that Ian Blair was a Labour police chief,  but Boris blew the bloody doors off on that wheeze and now has the Met under control. I’m not so sure that elected police chiefs is a good idea.  Quite apart from the idea of police chiefs lining up in a row with rosettes on – and what if a BNP Plod wanted to stand?  What then? – what exactly do the Tories mean by ‘locally elected’ police chiefs?  One commentator on The Spectator page drew the ravening hordes attention to an immediate practicality and flaw in the thinking.

A Mr Dennis Cooper writes ” Firstly my “local” police force is not “local”; it’s Thames Valley Police, covering three counties plus Milton Keynes. I question whether it would be possible to have a meaningful direct election of a Chief Constable for a force covering such a large and diverse geographical area.”

Of course, we could have lots of smaller police forces with even more plod wandering about with silver  fruit salad on their hats, but that rather goes against modern ideas of connected policing and maximisation of resources. But who said that ideas had to be workable to be policy?

The Invisible Man (and Woman) of Europe

Dickie Suffolk rang to say that we had done rather well in Europe. “A rather dull man who can’t write decent poetry from Belgium is President and some Northern lass has been propelled from obscurity into the the Miliband role.” he roared down the telephone.  Dickie is one of these people who hasn’t quite grasped how mobile phones work.  If he is outside, he shouts louder, not realising that there is  a microphone at the bottom of the device that works perfectly well outside and is, Jack tells me, designed  for indoors and  outside use. “At least we stuffed Blair” I didn’t have the strength to suggest to Dickie that ‘we’ had done absolutely nothing as ‘we’ are not yet in government.  Dickie is one of these people who tells others that he only has a few slots in his brain left and he doesn’t care to fill too many of them up with complex impractical philosophical knowledge or debate. I did suggest to him that he might benefit from taking The Sun rather than wrestling each day with The Times.  I recall that he looked at me almost gratefully for the suggestion. Good chap, Dickie…. to have for the weekend… but not destined, I fear, for any form of ministerial position.  Nor did I point out that ‘our lot’ seem to have teamed up with sundry right wing nutters and SS sympathisers on the extreme right of Europe and that Angela Merkel and Sarkozy are not exactly in daily touch with Hague and CameronDirect. I also have a sinking feeling that if ‘our’ lot was in power, we would have a Brit in possibly the even more influential post of High Representative and I could almost hear Cybil in the recesses of my mind saying “Your lot would have been sitting in dark corners muttering about federalism, a super state, sovereign states, Britannia ruling British waves and thinking up new bogey men with which to terrorise the people.” I do not know for sure, of course;  nor it is any of my business… I rather like diversity….  but I believe that my wife may be a Liberal-Democrat.  I know she votes.  She is always most careful to get out an early to do so.

I suppose the good news is that after all this hand wringing and putting Ireland under the cosh to vote Yes because the first No vote was inconvenient, the 27 leaders have managed to control the monster of Europa by flying in a couple of nonentities who will do what the leaders want them to do, rather than the other way round. Obama was diplomatic and sensitive to European pretensions, however, in suggesting that the new President of Europe and his High Representative will enable Europe to develop in a meaningful blah blah way…etc etc etc.

You win elections by getting more votes than the other parties.

Cybil rushed into my study a few moments ago with her laptop and told me that I must read something.  She set the laptop down in front of me.  I was reading the Investor’s Chronicle, or ‘Misers Monthly’ as Cybil calls it,  to see if I was missing anything. My attention was drawn to an article on a blog by Mr Tom Harris, a Labour MP for Glasgow South.  Seeing that he has quite a number of #1 Rosettes on his blog, like the  First in Show things we have at our County Fairs, I was quite happy to read what he had to say. His central premise was that Labour will win if they get more votes than the Tories – Yes – that this will depend on having better policies – Yes – and will not depend on jiggering about with the voting system – Yes.  So… Three Yes votes from me for that type of thinking. Good grief, I’ll be watching X-Factor like Farmer Brown or Britain’s Got Talent soon if I am not careful.

Cybil laughed when I told her that I agreed with the chap.  “See?  There are people out there in other parties who say interesting things.  Perhaps you should apply to become a Labour MP…..? it wouldn’t be the first time a Tory had crossed over.  Think Churchill, darling, she said with the usual glint in her eye… he enjoyed a bit of political cross-dressing as Shami Chakrabarti likes to say!”

There are limits.  I told her this.  Her response was insouciant.  “It takes a good man to know his limitations, darling.  You should watch Dirty Harry.”

With that, she was gone.  I could hear her tapping away into her laptop in the drawing room nearby.

PODCAST VERSION: A Hunstman’s View (2) / Invisibility

Continuing with my Friday ‘Rive Gauche’ theme, I thought I would start this week’s edition with some more political nonsense, tinged with a soupçon of hubris.

Political diarist Iain Dale, always worth a read whatever your political proclivities, asks:

When will it end? The Telegraph has the story tonight of Conservative MP David Curry, the new chairman of the Parliamentary Standards Committee (no, really), has been accused of claiming £30,000 of taxpayers’ money to pay for a house he hasn’t set foot in for four years, after being banned by his ex wife.

Mr Curry has referred himself to the Parliamentary Commissioner. Iain Dale, states, not unreasonably…“Quite astonishing behaviour. It’s even more astonishing that Mr Curry took on the role of chairman of the Standards Committee in the first place. Did no alarm bell ring, even at the back of his head?”
Harman Faces ‘Driving Offence’ Prosecution. Sky news reports: “Cabinet minister Harriet Harman will be prosecuted for allegedly driving without due care and attention and driving while using a hand-held mobile phone, the Crown Prosecution Service has said.” Harman plans to contest the charges, but Gordon Brown gets the opportunity to trot out the well worn line that he has ‘full confidence’ in her. Given Brown’s reputation, chronicled amusingly by Guido Fawkes at every opportunity, to jinx pretty well everything he supports… this may not be welcome news to Harman.

The new president of ‘Europe’ is more likely to be mistaken for someone who directs the traffic than stops it as Blair may well have done – but in the finest tradition of the Franco-German axis which appears to dominate in Europe,  we now have another ‘leader’ who has not faced a public vote in Mr Van Rompuy,  who also managed to become prime minister of Belgium, I believe, without being elected to the role by the people of Belgium.  BBC

While many will rejoice in the fact that Tony Blair did not get the traffic stopping role of ‘EU President’ – Britain did not miss out and another person who has never been elected to anything (it is believed) is now High Representative for Foreign Affairs and Security. Labour peer Baroness Ashton will now be doing the business. Most sardonic political commentary on the matter seems to focus on the fact that after 10 years of angst and pushing through ‘a new order for Europe’, the leaders of 27 countries have finally decided against striding across the world stage and would rather have someone as president who they can get to sweep up after them at meetings. We shall, no doubt, see how it all works out… or, more likely, we won’t..because RumpyPumpy, as he is now known, inevitably, in Britain…. probably won’t be appearing in the newspapers that often.

Meanwhile… The Great Architect of everything on earth and beyond, Lord Mandelson…another person not elected to govern over us…. is about to perpetrate a disgraceful abuse of power which is better left to the others to describe.  Let me point you in the direction first of a sane article on the topic of Mandelson’s grip on this country.

***

Dictatorial, disastrous, dire: Mandelson must not pass

Without debate, without public consulation, without any form of mandate, Lord Mandelson – an unelected politician – is preparing to place the rights of powerful industrial concerns above those of Parliament and above ours.

The powers that he wants to create – by means of a statutory instrument, which bypasses Parliamentary debate and decision – will criminalise downloading of content without permission. They will give him or anyone he chooses the power to enforce by law any action he or his successor thinks fit, in the service of protecting copyright.

These are the opening paragraphs for an excellent analysis by Rupert Goodwins. The entire article is a must read if you are interested in this issue.

We go over now to GEEKLAWYER, who, taking time out of his busy work and twittering schedule, has an excellent (and sane)  analysis of the very same issue. “Three Strikes and You’re Out” – A good read.

Despite well con­sid­ered inde­pen­dent advice on the eco­nom­ics of pol­icy deci­sions for the Inter­net from Pro­fes­sor Gower and var­i­ous oth­ers it seems that all it takes to buy Labour pol­icy is a bribe from a For­mula One homuncu­lus or a blow job from a rent boy on a nice yacht. Regrettably while Geeklawyer has a big mouth there some things he wont swal­low, one is the mem­ber of Hartle­pool; not even for some­thing as impor­tant as this.”

And then we have Keir Starmer QC, Director of Prosecutions, in The Telegraph: Chief prosecutor backs state snooping plans  Proposed new powers to track every email, phone call and website visit have been backed by the country’s top prosecutor as “vital” to fighting crime.” Telegraph

Civil liberty groups are none too pleased with this… “The DPP should also watch he doesn’t become a cheerleader for a government policy that the British people feel deeply uncomfortable about.”

Quite…

I have a podcast with Keir Starmer QC for the College of Law Inside Track series going out on Monday. It is an interesting podcast with a great deal of ground covered. I’ll post the link, as usual, on Monday.

After all this… a light touch before I go for the grand finale.

Earlier in the week I published the first episode of The Hunstman’s View – a diary of politics and ‘the human condition’ as seen through the eyes of Sir Henry ‘Baggers’ Bagshotte 8th Bt. I rather like Baggers – a man in his fifties, tory by instinct. but not,  by any means,  sure of the ground being developed by modern tories led by Cameron.  He is not, however, a Turnip Taliban. New episodes will be published over the coming months until the run up to the election in 2010.

I was delighted to see in the comments section of The first Hunstman’s View episode a comment from Geoffrey Woollard:

“I know nothing of Ms. Truss and her troubles. Sir Henry Bagshotte, Bt., has my sympathy, however, if only for his having such an unhelpful lady wife.”

I was even more delighted to discover that Geoffrey Woollard is a real life prospective parliamentary candidate…standing on an independent ticket. I wrote to Geoffrey to ask his permission to quote him in my piece and to ask if he minded my drawing attention to his candidature.  I received a very pleasant email back to the effect that I should go ahead, thanking  me, and noting that all publicity is good publicity.  So…I present…. Geoffrey Woollard, prospective parliamentary candidate for South East Cambridgeshire.

Geoffrey Woollard has a blog. Definitely worth a read.

I do hope that Geoffrey will keep an eye on the diary of Baggers…. Geoffrey is none to keen on Baggers’ enthusiasm for hunting. I suspect that Baggers won’t be doing a great deal of it, largely because I have absolutely no interest in hunting myself… and cannot really see how anyone can get a kick from hunting an animal to death for pleasure. Cybil, by the way… wife to Baggers 8.. will be rather more helpful than  Geoffrey may realise!  Bon Chance, Geoffrey.  Independent tickets are good.

And finally… An Anatomy of an Injustice

Imagine a High Court judge walking down Chancery Lane on his or her way to the Royal Courts of Justice.  The judge notices a carrier bag on the pavement.  Being a civic minded citizen he picks the carrier bag up, opens it, and discovers a sawn off shotgun within.  The judge is now ‘guilty’ of the strict liability offence of possession and subject to a minimum sentence of 5 years imprisonment – whether he phoned the police immediately or took it to a police station. Of course, it is highly likely – being a judge and all that – that the CPS may decide it is not in the public interest to prosecute or, if they do, the trial judge may well come to the entirely sensible view that the strict liability offence is mitigated by ‘exceptional circumstances’ and an absolute discharge will be given.

This, however, is not what happened in the celebrated Paul Clarke case – which provoked considerable outrage on twitter.  I was outraged.  Fortunately, a lawyer and writer, Jack of Kent – a leading law blogger, picked up the tale and analysed it in a measured and thoroughly researched way.  I spoke to the journalist who broke the story, consulted with my friend who writes the The White Rabbit blog  (Andrew Keogh, an experienced criminal barrister) and spoke at some length with Jack of Kent.  I could see no point in publishing anything myself for I would rather focus attention on this case – and attention there is – through Jack of Kent’s excellent analysis.

Please do read it. it is an important analysis; important for our rule of law and important for Justice…whatever that means these days.

Reprieve:

British government uses ‘Alice in Wonderland’ argument to cover up torture of Binyam Mohamed

The secrecy thing is getting out of hand. Recently, we had the Trafigura super injunction fiasco which, thankfully produced such outrage on twitter, in the blogs, The Guardian and other mainstream press, that the lawyers had to back down. We have secret evidence, we have SIAC, we have a growing culture of secrecy in this country, despite freedom of information legislation, and The Guardian reported today Mr Justice Silber’s judgement which I covered in my last post.

Good grief… we even have Baroness Deech wanting to keep information about plans for the Bar secret from barristers…. not a terribly clever move I would have thought. Do read the Times article for this latest bit of secrecy nonsense.  Baroness Deech wants to keep information secret so that members of the committee could get on with their proposals without being lobbied by third parties.  Have you ever tried to lobby a barrister?  Barristers are not exactly known for caving in to pressure, any more than a judge  would cave into public opinion in deliberating sentence. Ridiculous.  I’m with the barristers who complained about Baroness Deech’s position.

See: Times -  Barristers claim unfair secrecy as board debates ban on partnerships

In the meantime… here is a song wot I rote….. (with apologies to the geezer wot rote the original)

Jerusalem Redux

And did those writs in ancient time,
Walk upon England’s civil rights?
And was the Holy rule of law
On England’s pleasant pastures seen?

And did the Government Benign,
Spy forth upon our shrouded sills?
And was Jerusalem butchered here
Among those dark Satanic mills?

Bring me my bow of burning gold!
Bring me my arrows of desire!
Bring me my spear: O clouds unfold!
Bring me my Chariot of Fire!

I will not cease from mental fight;
Nor shall my sword sleep in my hand
Til we have rebuilt Jerusalem
In England’s green and pleasant land

The Guardian reports this morning:

PODCAST VERSION: A Hunstman’s View (1) / Law & Order

18th November 2009

Cybil not awfully impressed by my latest idea to stand for parliament,  but having seen the buffoonery in SW Norfolk t’other night with the Turnip Taliban, I spoke to Jack, my head keeper,  and we both agreed I could not really make any more of  a pig’s ear of things than they managed to do as reported on Newsnight on Monday.

Arriving at Marylebone station too late for breakfast and rather too early for lunch,  the fare on offer in the station concourse had little appeal. Fortunately, Mrs P, our wonderful cook, had had the foresight to  slip a small chicken pie into my shooting bag and this, together with my whisky charged hip flask, I was able to take a perfectly acceptable brunch, seated on my shooting stick by a tree in the Marylebone Road. It was fortunate that there was sufficient earth  surrounding the tree for me to set my shooting stick for otherwise I would have had  to eat standing up – which  is just not acceptable and I would have had a bit of a walk to Regent’s Park to find a suitable vantage point.

Believing there was a possibility that I may be asked a few questions about politics and possibly even current affairs for my ‘preliminary’ chat at Central Office, I discovered that the Conservative Party is now being run rather well by a group of chaps from Eton.  I’m a rather poor example of the produce of Collegium Sanctae Mariae prope Wintoniam but at least my brains didn’t fall out the back of my head when I was there unlike some of my friends who like to say there were ‘educated’ at Eton. Be that as it may.  Jack, my head keeper, had told me that The Telegraph was no longer a reliable source of tory policy and suggested that I get hold of a copy of The Sun newspaper to read on the train.  He told me it would not take long for me to get a sense of current Tory thinking.  He was right.  it didn’t.

Law & Order brief

Reading The Sun, under the wonderful headline You’ll cop it…now! I discovered that a Tory government will give police powers to hand out on-the-spot hard labour punishments to street yobs. I know the chaps at Eton used to enjoy a bit of weed, quite a lot of it, they say, but I had no idea they were still smoking the stuff. The progenitor, or at least the distributor of this nonsense, is one Chris Grayling, Shadown Home Secretary.  He wants to deliver a sharp shock to tearaways.. he even dubbed this half thought out plan as “the 21st century equivalent of the clip around the ear”.

I rang Cybil and asked if she knew anything about Mr Grayling.  She did, but wasn’t minded to tell me as she had better things to do. Jack, my head keeper, was in the estate office. Nothing in Debretts.com but he did discover from Wikipedia that Grayling had spent much of his time before entering parliament at the BBC, then Channel 4 and running TV production companies and being a management consultant – so he is obviously completely suited to running the Home Office and opining on how best to get criminal justice shucked into shape.

The Sun reported “The Conservatives’ crime supremo said ‘Early intervention is a crucial way to deal with anti-social behaviour.’  I read with mounting amusement that this Tory Robocop wants to get yobs to dig gardens or clean up graffiti. I was beginning to wonder if my decision to stand for political office was sensible, given the rather bizarre policy on law and order I had just read. But  there we are.

Pre-selection chat

I received a message on my Blackberry to say that my interview would not be at Central Office after all. There was a bit of a flap on – the Turnip Taliban were not taking it lying down.  This news did not surprise me.  I know the type.  They remind me of people at dinner parties who repeat themselves incessantly and snort  when they manage to say something that makes even vague sense. I was told that we would, instead, meet at a pub in Chelsea.

Interview didn’t go well. A slick elegantly besuited young man who cannot have been more than 30, told me that I was not a woman.  This, I have known for much of my life. It would appear, also, that I have a few skeletons in my cupboard.  This puzzled me at first.  All the Bagshottes have been been laid to rest in the family crypt and I could not quite see why I should suffer from the really disgraceful behaviour, venal, fornicatory or otherwise,  of my ancestors. Young man looked at me with amused disdain and told me that my skeleton was that I had worked in The City for most of my career until inheriting the pile from Baggers No 7.  I was told that it ‘would not be politically expedient, at the present time, to have another candidate who (a) was a man (b) had worked in The City  (c) had inherited wealth and (d) enjoyed a spot of fox hunting. He did say that if ‘we get a large majority, you’ll be right in there for one of the early slots.’. Interview over.

So, my political ambitions thwarted, I returned to the estate.  Cybil found it most amusing and told me that I had far better things to do with my time.  She said I should be a diarist and chronicle the goings on of the new guard. Cybil  talks a lot of sense;  sometimes rather too inconveniently for my tastes… but there we are.  So I shall.

***

PODCAST VERSION: A Hunstman’s View (1) / Law & Order

West London Man is still in La Guardia jail… New York…. he may get out soon and return…. but if you wish to read of his exploits… here it is.

***

The Hunstman series is being sponsored by

Lord Strathclyde, leader of the Tories in The Lords lists this in his bio on the Tory Party website:

PROUDEST POLITICAL ACHIEVEMENTS:

• Protecting the integrity of the House of Lords and resisting government attempts to turn it into a ‘crony’ house of rubber stampers

There is a delicious irony, therefore…at least to my sardonic eye this windy, grey, morning that the same Lord Strathclyde, possibly puffed up on high octane self importance, is reported in The Guardian today as being the architect of a plan to thwart the processes of people who have actually been elected to power to govern our country.

The Guardian reports:

Tory peers are ready to block most of the government bills to be announced in the Queen’s speech tomorrow, threatening to mire the final days of Gordon Brown’s government in frustration and delay. Lord Strathclyde, the Conservative leader in the Lords, predicted that few if any of the bills announced amid tomorrow’s fanfare and pageantry would reach the statute book without the consent of Tory peers.

“We all know that this Queen’s speech is all about better electioneering and politics rather than the better governance of the country,” he told the Guardian.

I do appreciate (before some peer has apoplexy about a blogger criticising the Lords) that the House of Lords does much good work, scrutinising legislation and that not all of them are on the take with cash for questions or have difficulties remembering where they live for expenses purposes.

If Lord Strathclyde is saying that he and his fellow peers will deliberately undermine the process of a democratically elected government for his own political ends, rather than act in a rational and reasoned way and bring wisdom to the political process – then he could find himself lighting a touch paper – for there are many in this country who would prefer to have a second chamber of ‘elected’ representatives who are interested in acting in the interests of the wider good.

The Guardian, with a degree of subtlety, notes… “Tory strategists know they will have to tread carefully not to be seen to be blocking popular measures, something governments perennially accuse oppositions of in the runup to an election.”

***

I am a fan of In The Thick of It – the political satire.  It is just as well that Malcolm Tucker is an entirely fictional character, bearing no resemblance to any person, living or dead…. because Tucker certainly would not have allowed Strathclyde to stand in front of a Scottish Conservative poster… just too tempting, I am afraid, for me this morning as I cropped the image in Photoshop. (Idid nothing else to the original image)

Catherine Baksi, writing in The Law Society Gazette reports:

“The public wants direct access to barristers in crime, family and immigration work and is ‘dissatisfied with paying two lawyers for one job’, a panel of leading barristers claimed this week. Kevin Leigh, barrister at No5 Chambers in London, said: ‘It’s about giving proper choice to the market and increasing access to justice at a reasonable cost.”

Given the changing legal landscape, given the decline (possibly, temporary) in demand for legal services, given the severe reduction of the legal aid budget, it is entirely reasonable for the ‘public’ to take this stance and absolutely right that leading members of the Bar are taking the view that direct access to barristers is to be encouraged.  It may require some specialist training for those barristers who have been used to the support services provided by solicitors (if applicable) but it is certainly feasible if senior barristers think it is.

Baksi notes ” Since 2004 the public has been able to bypass solicitors and instruct barristers directly in most areas of civil work, but not in most criminal and family work and all immigration work. Following a consultation last year, the Bar Standards Board approved the extension of the scheme to these areas. The change awaits sign off from the Legal Services Board.”

I rather liked this quote from Mark Ellison QC : “…public access was an opportunity for barristers to take control of their fees and stop ‘being the trolley dollies of solicitors’.”

Crisis…
Also in the Law Society Gazette this week… Dominic Grieve QC tells the Bar Council Conference that “The country is facing ‘the biggest crisis in access to justice since the second world war’.

Grieve is right… not that he is going to magic up the money if the Tories form the next government and he becomes Minister of Justice, Lord Chancellor or Attorney-General – or, indeed, all three.  Anything is, of course, possible.  Who would have thought that a new Supreme Court could have been conjured up according to some on the back of a fag packet during a late night whisky between Tony Blair and Charlie Falconer?

Dominic Grieve is reported as opining, possibly even with appropriate solemnity,   “…there was insufficient money to fund the system, but said the idea of getting more money from the Treasury was a ‘fantasy’.”

He said other sources of funding, such as a contingent legal aid fund, legal expenses insurance and using the interest generated from pooling client money, should be explored. At least we know where the lie of the land is should the Tories gain power.

The legal press continues to note the nose diving profits of law firms, the difficulties faced by middle-tier firms and expresses surprise that law schools are rolling in quids because demand to go into a profession of declining opportunity is so high. Mad, really… but there we are. Students must make their own choices but, certainly,  cannot plead that they weren’t warned. There will be tears before bedtime, inevitably, for some students when they graduate and find that there is no room at the Inn or, indeed, at a law firm.

Podcast
If you would like to hear an experienced Family Law solicitor who is also a Law Society Council member explain just how bad access to justice is – then, please, listen to my podcast with Christina Blacklaws. Christina knows what she is talking about – she experiences the crisis every working day.  It IS serious.

Listen to the podcast.

The Daily Mail noted last December - Officials in Jack Straw’s private office are used to seeing him in tights, or finding him on the floor of the gents struggling to get the sheer silk over his knees without a snag.

The Daily Mail was referring to Straw, qua Lord Chancellor,  dressing up for the annual bit of hocus pocus where The Lord Chancellor presents The Queen with  a speech laying out the government plans for the next session. The Mail noted: “In a Labour Party packed with republicans, Mr Straw takes a perverse pleasure in pointing out that he was happy to walk backwards down the steps of the throne after presenting Her Majesty with the words for the Queen’s Speech on Wednesday.”

No doubt, Straw plans to do a bit of Health & Safety legislation offending walking backwards again today when the same ritual will take place. For my part, as a republican, I would prefer to get rid of all the pageantry relating to government and reserve it for Coronations and other non-political events… but there again, I would prefer to have no more Coronations. That being said, I am a fairly laid back republican… a libertarian republican….  and if the monarchy and all the pageantry and pomp and circumstance gives pleasure to the majority, I  am quite happy to go along with it.  It is all pretty harmless stuff;  a remembrance to a once glorious or  inglorious past, depending on your world view.

I am not so keen, however, on all this flummery in relation to government and I find it ludicrous that our representatives should kneel to the Monarch however meaningless the ritual is in the modern era. This is because I rather like the republican ideal – that ‘all people are born equal’ – an ideal, I accept, more observed in the breaking but, nevertheless, an ideal.

At least Nick Clegg, leader of Britain’s third largest party [ Lib-Dems ]  has the right idea.  He has described it as a waste of time and money.

The Independent takes time away from warning us about Polar bears being left stranded on icebergs to discuss the issue: The Big Question: What is the Queen’s Speech, and does it serve any real purpose?

And since I am in such a ‘tolerant’ mood today, what better way of telling you about Joel Rosenberg’s excellent Blawg Review #28 which was published yesterday. (Celebrating International Tolerance Day)

“We tend to idealize tolerance, then wonder why we find ourselves infested with losers and nut cases. — Patrick Nielsen Hayden

“I have seen gross intolerance shown in support of tolerance.” — Coleridge

Joel Rosenberg isn’t a lawyer.  He is a writer and firearms instructor.  He has even described himself as a Jew with a Gun.  His Twitter bio…. “Writer, firearms trainer, smartass — you know: the usual. I exchange tweets with Joel on Twitter- he knows what he is on about and his Blawg review is a good read… not surprisingly.

I sit here dressed in perfectly normal modern clothing, a glass of Rioja to my left, waiting for news from Norfolk… from the very heartlands of Turnip Taliban power.  Sir Jeremy Bagge and his ravening horde, who don’t want to be taken for ‘complete idiots’ by Tory Central Office,  are about to determine… not just the fate of Liz Truss… but the fate of David Cameron and his ability to direct policy from Notting Hill.  If Cameron loses… the fogeys up and down the country, young and old, will riot in their unusual coloured corduroy trousers and tweed or waxed jackets and run amok… and the slick Central Office machine may well hyperventilate.  It could be the beginning of another civil war originating in East Anglia… but this one could just be bizarre and even amusing to behold..

We shall see..

UPDATE 10.15 pm 16 Nov: I am advised on twitter:  Cameron 1 – Fogeys 0 |  Liz Truss survives de-selection bid. They’ll just have to go back to growing food and general Bufton-Tuftoning…  Cameron survives… so no dancing for him on this occasion….

While I am on the topic of unfluence and puppet masters – I have been watching a rather disturbing programme – Dispatches – about the perhaps not so benign influence of the pro-Israel lobby in Britain.  They seem to be puppet masters of the financial kind…. anyone know much about the hidden power of this lobby, how much money they give, plan to give… wonder why the Tory polbloggers haven’t picked up on this with their usual ardour. Maybe Dispatches has ‘got it all wrong?”…

Dear Reader,

I write this weekend from Norfolk… metaphorically speaking… the seat of Sir Jeremy Bagge of  Stradsett Hall, self appointed leader of the Taliban Turnips – the greatest foe the slick new Tories led by David Cameron have yet had to face.  All will be made clear later.

I have decided, this week, to devote all of my weekly postcard to The Tories… one must, after all, be even handed.

The Tories are now enjoying the patronage of The Sun - a leading British newspaper unique in modern Britain -  with the ability to change political conviction, political editorial integrity and affiliation at the flick of a switch…. the switch, of course, being controlled by Murdoch. Unfortunately, The Sun rather ballsed things up with the attack on Gordon Brown for writing a letter with spelling mistakes in it to Mrs Janes – ironically getting Mrs Janes’ name wrong themselves on their own website. The Daily Mirror retaliated with a picture of David Cameron paying his respects.  The Daily Mirror accused Cameron of bad taste in taking his own photographer to record the event (I got this picture from the Conservative  Party’s fotostream) and trading on Remembrance and the many things this means to the many people in Britain who choose to pay respect to the Glorious Dead and the living who fight wars in our name to this day. I’m not sure that retaliation of this nature is that helpful, frankly.

There is a wonderful story in The Telegraph (14th November 2009): Tory rebel tries to remove Elizabeth Truss as safe seat candidate

The self-appointed leader of a group of Tory rebels will on Monday try to have ‘A list’ choice Elizabeth Truss removed as a candidate after revelations of her extra-marital affair. But Sir Jeremy Bagge says he has ‘got nothing against women’.”

The elegant Stradsett Hall sits beside a lake of gently gliding swans. But the tranquillity of this 1,000 acre Norfolk estate could not be more deceptive.

For this is the home of Sir Jeremy Bagge, the self-appointed leader of a group of Tory rebels who are proving the most intractable enemy David Cameron has yet had to do battle with. Nicknamed the Turnip Taliban, these are the traditionalists who reject their leader’s modernising agenda and are flexing their muscles ahead of a crucial meeting to decide the fate of the beleaguered “A list” candidate Elizabeth Truss.

The story is both interesting and amusing.  Cameron, no doubt, is concerned about it because it reveals to the people of Britain that there are still some wonderfully eccentric people living well away from Westminster who disagree with him, who are Old Conservative and whose views may not go down at all well with the Labour voters Cameron is trying to seduce, let alone the slick new Tories of Eton, The City, Notting Hill and Soho….

I particularly liked the idea of Sir Jeremy Bagge finding a Turban (I have tried to picture what he might look like wearing a Taliban Turban above) in his ‘hice’ and wandering about the estate wearing it.

The Telegraph reports:

Explaining his hostility to Ms Truss, who he initially supported, he said: “She was the best there was on the day.

“I was then very disappointed to hear that there was a skeleton in the cupboard. I’m not judging her on her past, it is the fact that Central Office did not disclose to us that there was a skeleton. When I rang up HQ they said you should have Googled her. I don’t have time to Google. We were given a briefing sheet and it wasn’t on there.”

But underneath this perfectly straight explanation lie simmering tensions. It is obvious that grass roots activists have been reaching boiling point for some time over the issue of Mr Cameron imposing his preferred candidates on them.

“I personally feel that Central Office are dictatorial. They have shoehorned us, they have deceived us, they have betrayed us.” Sir Jeremy pauses before declaring: “I think they need a boot up the backside, a b—– good kick to wake them up, to be perfectly honest.”

The Telegraph, pleased with its new found investigative skills following the long running and hyperventilating tour de farce on the MP expenses scandal…asked…

Dictatorial methods aside, however, the question still arises, what is wrong with a list full of women? Sir Jeremy repeatedly says he has nothing against women.

“Sorry, no, I have never said I’m anti-women. I have got absolutely nothing against women.

“Who cooks my lunch? Who cooks my dinner? How did my wonderful three children appear? Women, you can’t do without them. My god, take my wife.”

What does she do for a living? “What does she do? She looks after me. Looks after the children. Runs the house.”

I am convinced that the next election is going to be won or lost on the playing fields of Eton…. but it is good to see that there is Old Eton and New Eton.  Sir Jeremy Bagge, of course, was educated at Eton… where else?

Deeply Dippy
In a rather bizarre postscript to all of this…. (I happened to Google Sir Jeremy Bagge and Eton – and it threw up the story from the BBC) …. Sir Jeremy Bagge was ‘guardian’ to Crown Prince Dipendra, who is believed to have shot members of his family (Wiping out most of the Nepalese Royal Family)  before turning his gun on himself and who studied at Eton for three years.
***
I particularly enjoyed the comment of the Provost of Eton on hearing that a former Etonian had commited a  mass murder…

“He was a very popular boy and was also liked by all his teachers.”

Eton has always been at the forefront of British interest…. and, it would seem… it still is.  There are believed to be quite a few Old Etonians in the Shadow  Cabinet.  Cameron, himself an Old Etonian,  seems to have two Old Etonians who could be just a bit more than a pain in the arse… if you will forgive the metaphor…. we must not forget Mayor Boris…. for he could well be a political Blofeld who wins the day eventually against the slick new James Bond of the political firmament.

As I had no booze at all last night – not entirely surprising after a rather long 15 hour lunch on Friday which ended at 3.00 am on Saturday morning… I’m orf…. as we say down on the Medway… to have a glass or two of Rioja.

Best as always

Charon

A short Rive Gauche today… I leave for London on the 7.30 am train to record a podcast with Shami Chakrabarti, director of Liberty, for the College of Law Inside Track podcast series I have been doing for them.

RollonFriday – their ‘news’ always worth a look on a Friday – reports: “Things are so bad at Slaughter and May that the firm’s most famous partner has emailed all staff and encouraged them to sign up to a discounted beer offer – at a grand saving of 42p a bottle. Full story…

While I am not an ardent supporter of the prime minister, I do think that The Sun has behaved badly with the campaign against Gordon Brown in recent days.  The Guardian reports on the backlash against The Sun.

***

Baroness Neville-Spook on Question Time last night was asked by John Humphrys (standing in for David Dimbleby who was knocked unconscious by his wife’s bullock earlier in the day) if the Tories would distance themselves from The Sun.  After a fair amount of waffle and strangulated vowels,  Baroness Neville-Bond-Blofeld conceded that the party would probably not do so. Quite what she was doing representing the Tories on Question Time last night, I have no idea.

I can only assume that the ‘big beasts’ of the Tory party, the ‘Grandees’, were rehearsing the classic song Springtime for Hitler for their version of The Producers so they are ready to take over the reins of power and ravish our country in May or June 2010.

And on that note.. I’m orf to London to see a woman about a podcast…and then, hopefully, some amusements with Geeklawyer and others.  I lead a reclusive life on the Medway these days… I have to escape occasionally… a piu tarde.

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