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Archive for May 30th, 2009

Barbecue man returns… argghhhhh….

So with the predictability of “Phew Wot a Scorcha” on the year’s hottest day being the headline in The Sun – today, as the sun shone, Britain’s men went down to B&Q, Homebase or their local garage forecourt, like stampeding Wildebeest,   to purchase a device that would allow them to run their own private crematorium.

Barbecue Man is BACK!

Barbecue Man is not, necessarily, a stupid man – for this particular affliction crosses class and intelligence divides.  For some men it even puts them in the same species as the rest of us.

Doctors, writing in The Lancet, say that the patient presents with minor second degree burns, often red scorch marks on his forehead and nose and with respiratory problems from breathing in kerosene soaked wood smoke.  In extreme cases the patient suffers from the delusion that he can cook.

I can, and do, cook.  I enjoy cooking.  I even watch chefery programmes on TV.  A lot of men I know cannot cook.  In a world where restaurants are closed, they would die.  Why these men who preside over their new toy, usually dressed in an absurd apron,  think that kerosene soaked wood infusing a cremated steak or horrendous frozen burger burnt beyond napalm on the outside, raw inside, is going to appeal, I do not know.  Charles Darwin is silent on the matter.  I have attended barbecues where these men are cooking.  I simply say to them as they call us out to dinner… “Just chuck mine into the fire… I’m into recycling.”

I continue writing the world’s longest Blawg Review… it will be published on the stroke of midnight on Sunday night/Monday morning… if I am still sober.

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Lawcast 137: Gawain Towler, prospective UKIP candidate in the Euro elections

Today, as part of a new series of political podcasts for the Wardman Wire, I am talking to Gawain Towler, the prospective UKIP candidate for the South West in the forthcoming election. We discuss UKIP policies on Euirope, the alternative to membership of the EU, and a range of current issues. I also ask Gawain if UKIP will reap the benefit of support from voters fed up with the main parties after the expenses revelations of the last three weeks.

Listen to the podcast

Podcast version for iTunes

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