By popular demand – the return of our very successful Banking course – 2 years CPD A Personal Christmas Statement to clients from Dr Erasmus Strangelove I was pleased to see, while casually reviewing CCTV footage of our associates workfloor on Christmas Day, that good legal work was being done. It was pleasing to note […]
Search Results for 'muttley'
Personal Statement from Dr Erasmus Strangelove, Senior Partner, Muttley Dastardly LLP
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Sunday, December 29, 2013| Leave a Comment »
Muttley Dastardly LLP Conferences: Advanced Fraud for the modern banker
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Monday, July 2, 2012| 2 Comments »
UPDATE: Diamond has resigned. Marcus Agius has ‘unresigned’..or, should that be…’re-signed’ ? I just had to tweet… “My name is Marcus Agius, Commander of the Barclays, Chairman to a fraudulent bank.. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.”
Statement from Muttley Dastardly LLP on SRA scrapping minimum trainee wage and plans for No fault sackings
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Monday, May 21, 2012| Leave a Comment »
FROM THE OFFICE OF DR STRANGELOVE, SENIOR PARTNER, MUTTLEY DASTARDLY LLP To: All staff 21st May 2012 RE: SRA scrapping of trainee minimum wage and Government ‘No fault Sackings’ proposals 1. The Partners met for a private lunch at Alan Ducasse’s rather fine restaurant at The Dorchester today to consider the implications of the scrapping […]
Press Announcement: Muttley Dastardly LLP take on the new world of legal services with *Lawyerborg 2.0*
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Tuesday, February 7, 2012| 3 Comments »
PRESS RELEASE In just seven days Dr Erasmus Strangelove, senior partner of Muttley Dastardly LLP, will reveal Lawyerborg 2.0 – 20% paralegal 80% machine with no inbuilt soul issues. Dr Erasmus Strangelove said today in Dubai: “We believe that our new creation will transform the way legal services are delivered in the United Kingdom. We […]
Muttley Dastardly LLP: Abusus non tollit usum… Abuse of a right does not invalidate use
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Saturday, January 28, 2012| 1 Comment »
The Partners of Muttley Dastardly LLP meet in closed session each Friday at 10.00 am. Following the unfortunate departure from the firm of managing partner Matt Muttley in the summer of 2011, Dr Erasmus Strangelove has taken over the leadership of the firm as CEO and Senior Partner. A transcript of Dr Strangelove’s speech follows…. […]
Breaking News: Matt Muttley DEAD!! – Dr Erasmus Strangelove takes over as CEO, Muttley Dastardly LLP
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Saturday, July 16, 2011| 5 Comments »
STATEMENT FROM THE DESK OF DR ERASMUS STRANGELOVE, CEO AND SENIOR PARTNER It is with deep regret, see above, that I announce the death of Matt Muttley. I have known Matt for many years Together, we built profits, capital reserves and tax efficient schemes only dreamed of in some law firms. Matt Muttley, inspired by […]
Muttley Dastardly LLP (22): A trainee is interviewed for a training contract
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Saturday, June 4, 2011| 8 Comments »
Eva Braun, Matt Muttley’s PA, elegantly dressed as always in a tailored black suit and high heels, led a young man into the Partner’s Boardoom and seated him at the opposite end of the long boardroom table. He had a brown paper bag over his head. Dr Erasmus Strangelove, Director of Psyops, Strategy and Education, […]
Rive Gauche: “We, at Muttley Dastardly LLP, marvel at the antics of our fellow lawyers in the City. Long may it continue… mwahahahaha.”
Posted in Charon, Rive Gauche on Friday, June 3, 2011| 3 Comments »
Fridays, for me, are a strange mix of weekday and weekend. I often find that I don’t get many responses to emails and when I call to speak to a client I am often told they are ‘working from home’. As I don’t wish to be a ‘stalker’, I tend to leave the matter there […]
Muttley Dastardly LLP (21): Monthly Psyops Report to The Partners from Dr Erasmus Strangelove
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Monday, May 9, 2011| 2 Comments »
EYES ONLY To: The Partners From: Dr Erasmus Strangelove, Partner, Director of Psyops, Strategy and Education RE: MONTHLY PSYOPS REPORT *** 1. “Many reasons for solicitors to start using social media” There are many reasons why we would encourage other solicitors to use social media. I select but two: (a) Tie up of competitor human […]
Muttley Dastardly LLP (Episode 20): Hugo de Vertback on the Vickers Report for Reform of the Banking Sector
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Tuesday, April 12, 2011| 5 Comments »
PRESS RELEASE (EMBARGOED UNTIL YOUR FEE PAYMENT CLEARS FOR VALUE) Hugo de Vertback, Partner and Head of Capital and Private Wealth, Muttley Dastardly LLP – The Vickers Report for Reform of the Banking Sector In the early morning of Monday 11th April, a group of hitherto unknown men and women – unknown outside City circles […]
Muttley Dastardly LLP (Episode) 19: Retention of staff and human capital maximisation
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Wednesday, March 30, 2011| 1 Comment »
MEMORANDUM EYES ONLY To: The Partners From: Dr Erasmus Strangelove, Director of Education, Strategy and Psyops RE: Retention of staff and human capital maximisation Gentlemen, 1. I am reviewing currently our human operational asset base for the purpose of refreshing the stock. This also ties in with an assessment of productivity of junior associate staff. […]
Dr Erasmus Strangelove of Muttley Dastardly LLP is interviewed by LegalBrick Road… (It was billable)
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Friday, March 4, 2011| Leave a Comment »
Dr Erasmus Strangelove, Partner and Director of Education, Strategy and Psyops at Muttley Dastardly LLP is interviewed by Just Go Direct’s Legal Brick Road…. do not fear… it was chargeable…. “Law is a business like any other these days. We have the knowledge. You have the money. You give us the money. We give you […]
Muttley Dastardly LLP (Episode 18): No repudiatory breaches with our client engagement letters
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Friday, March 4, 2011| Leave a Comment »
MEMORANDUM From: Matt Muttley, managing partner To: Partners and fee earners RE: MOST IMPORTANT – FEES – ENGAGEMENT LETTERS TO CLIENTS 1. Perusing The Law Society Gazette this morning, I came across a report of the ‘utmost importance’ and I write to ask all partners and fee earners to ensure that clients are ‘fully appraised’ […]
Muttley Dastardly LLP (Episode 17): Dr Erasmus Strangelove reveals… his plan for domination of the legal market.
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Wednesday, February 23, 2011| Leave a Comment »
Can you imagine a situation where there are so many lawyers qualifying each year through the law schools that we have an endless supply of ‘enthusiastic and able’ young freelance lawyers clamouring not to get into the profession – there is is no room at the Inn or in the big City firms – but […]
Muttley Dastardly LLP (Episode 16): Partners [Eyes Only] General Counsel taking an interest in how law firms manage their firms
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Friday, February 18, 2011| Leave a Comment »
MEMORANDUM – EYES ONLY To: The Partners From: Dr Erasmus Strangelove, Partner and Director of Education, Strategy and Psyops Gentlemen, In keeping with our tradition and work best practice ethic, I am assuming that you will all have been too busy to read the legal press this week. My earlier memorandum on competitor activity this […]
Muttley Dastardly LLP (Episode 15): Vultures in Togas and ‘the cattle of the courtroom’
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Wednesday, February 16, 2011| 1 Comment »
MEMORANDUM To: All Associates From: Dr Erasmus Strangelove, Partner and Director of Education, Strategy and Psyops RE: VULTURES IN TOGAS Obiter, writing in in The Law Society Gazette, refers to a speech by the Master of The Rolls, Lord Neuberger, where he considers, inter alia, the topic of why lawyers are so unpopular. Lord Neuberger […]
Law Review: Inside The Supreme Court – ‘Get Real’ says LSC CEO on legal aid – A Valentine card from Muttley Dastardly LLP .
Posted in Charon, Law Review on Wednesday, February 9, 2011| 1 Comment »
Britain’s Supreme Court (72 mins) Channel 4: This gripping, feature-length documentary charts the first year in the life of Britain’s new Supreme Court – the highest court in the land – now available on Channel 4 OD I was up earlier than usual this morning at 3.30 and, with Broadband working perfectly now, I watched […]
Muttley Dastardly LLP (Episode 14): Operation Pharaoh – Positioning for the new Egypt
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Monday, January 31, 2011| 2 Comments »
TOP SECRET / PARTNERS ONLY BRIEFING PAPER From: Dr Erasmus Strangelove, Partner, Director of Education, Strategy and Psyops RE: OPERATION PHARAOH – POSITIONING LEGAL SERVICES IN THE NEW EGYPT 1. In the wake of events unfolding in Egypt in the last week, from intelligence received from the many, varied and newly minted Egyptologists now broadcasting […]
Muttley Dastardly LLP (13): MD are hiring and Dr Strangelove is in the chair – The Trainee Contract Interview
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Thursday, January 27, 2011| 1 Comment »
Muttley Dastardly LLP interview once each year for eight trainees. One will make the cut. Retention rates published in the legal press are of no concern to the firm’s enigmatic Director of Education, Training, Strategy and Psyops – Dr Erasmus Strangelove LLB, JD, BCL, MBA, Ph.D, Barrister Dr Strangelove took his seat in The Partner’s […]
Muttley Dastardly LLP Episode 12: Age is not a factor at The Firm
Posted in Charon, Muttley Dastardly LLP on Saturday, January 15, 2011| 1 Comment »
STATEMENT FROM MATT MUTTLEY Managing Partner, Muttley Dastardly LLP To: All staff RE: AGE 1. The government is planning to abolish the retirement age of 65. As with many things the government does, this will not affect us. Partners may retire when they wish. If they haven’t retired by the time they get to 50, […]