Announcement by Eva Braun on behalf of Charon QC
After a week of worrying about the Cash for Honours decision and visiting various law blogs, and as a direct and causal result thereof, Charon has been absent from his blawg after a bout of a rather curious illness: Irrationalis Loca Donaldsonia.
Charon has responded well to treatment. In fact, he is self prescribing:
A statement on behalf of Charon QC
Eva Braun. PA to Matt Muttley of Muttley Dastardly LLP
Irrationalis Loca Donaldsonia
The symptoms of this particular disease may be described as follows:
Following the appearance of Sir Liam Donaldson (Government Chief Medical Officer) on television, radio or in printed media, the patient sustains an immediate attack of irrational anger. This is followed by a short bout of Tourettte’s Syndrome where the patient starts swearing uncontrollably. In extreme cases the patient experiences a need to start writing. Often the output is illogical, badly composed, lacking in syntax; with punctuation and spelling presenting at the level of a person with a reading age of 8.
If medical treatment is not given within two hours of an attack the patient may start self prescribing Rioja or other red wines, exceeding the government recommended dosage, usually resulting in further written output of an irrational nature. Often the patient starts to hallucinate and imagine a florid, overweight, man appearing on television to commend the use of taxation to increase the cost of alcohol, announce that he is asking the government to ban smoking completely and recommend restrictions on the advertising and sale of alcohol generally – along the lines of the Swedish government run alcohol monopoly systembolaget. There is no known cure for this syndrome but some psychiatrists have experienced a limited success with patients by using distraction therapy and recommending that the patient visits a pub to drink a bottle of wine and smoke cigarettes. The prognosis is, generally, good and treatment is enhanced if the patient is able to be distracted while drinking Rioja with fellow suffferers.
Your reference to systembolaget reminded me of the old Stranglers song Sweden, written after a particularly exciting tour of that country:
“Let me tell you about Sweden
Only country where the clouds are interesting
Big brother says it’s the place to go
Too much time to think, too little to do.”
Perhaps England in a few years time?
Apparently a man pointing out to 3 punters that a bar in London was now a no smoking zone, has just been shot and seriously injured. It is a dangerous business.:)
[…] a short post: I feel obligated to pick up on Charon’s post about Irrationalis Loca Donaldsonia, which inspired an outburst of laughter bearing a passing similarity to the outbursts of anger […]
Is this mad or what?
Hairs on the palm of your hand.
Extraordinary Jailhouselawyer… thanks for the link
[…] had anything to do with this article. It appears not. (Readers may be aware that I suffer from Irrationalis Loca Donaldsonia, a most unfortunate condition, which flares up whenever busybodies, doctors and others start […]